Browsing Tag

funny

LOVE + RELATIONSHIPS

Breaking Up To Break It Down

breaking up

Overall when it comes to reading advice on being forever alone single, dealing with men and dating/relationship advice, it normally goes in one little drunken ear and out the other.

dont careWhich the fact that I don’t pay much attention to any of these is most likely my problem today.

im the only single im the only single2

I just prefer to let life be the real teacher. Nothing can teach you like the experience of your own. And from random conversations with that one aunt.

gtf over it and move onWhile being told that wearing more camisoles and brightly colored cardigans will make you appear more friendly and less intimidating to latch you a man are eyeroll worthy, the advice columns about break-ups are usually the ones that are the fucking worst. Sure, some can be inspiring or thought provoking, but then there are others that troll in with advice like:

EAT YOUR FEELINGS

TAKE MEDICATION

SPILL ALL THE DETAILS OF THE BREAK-UP

TAKE A SUPER WILD TRIP WITH YOUR GIRLFRIENDS

and the goddamn Nickelback worst:

GET UNDER A NEW GUY TO GET OVER THE OLD ONE

new mail4

Now, I almost wish that this person that recently made news read at LEAST that hot mess bundle of advice, because she clearly didn’t read the ones that were for sane people. Let’s just call her….Felicia.

ex bf calls

WTF

WHET

FELICIA. GURL.

That’s 121,669 shades of NO DAMN MA’AM. In a span of seven days.

You should call NO ONE 77,639 times in one week. NOT. ONE. SOUL. Not work related people, not your mama, not your amazing sibling, not Jake from State Farm, not your best friend from childhood, not Tyrone, not your fabulous friend that gets even more fabulous after they’ve have a few cocktails, not the pizza place, not even on Jesus. He has enough on his plate, sis.

jesusClearly you never read a break up tip post-it let alone an actual column, or owned an Beyonce‘ album, or had a heart to heart with someone or been forced to watch He’s Just Not That Into You with a girlfriend on a drunken Saturday night.

So, thanks for the inspiration on breaking this down, and this is for you Felicia.

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THROWBACK TALES

Throwback Tales: 24hr Confession of A Crazy Cat Lady

cat lady

The pet debate on adding a little fur baby edition to my roof has been an ongoing scrimmage for a few years now.

Should I or shouldn’t I?

Shouldn’t I or should I?

Well, in the midst of summertime madness and most likely too much sunshine oozing into my brain cells, I’d decided that I definitely should take a jump into the kennel and become a pet mama….which only meant that naturally I’d live to regret that decision.

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PEEVE THIS

Peeve This: The Winter Edition

pet peeves

It is clear that everyone has their fair share of pet peeves and last Fall I came to the realization that the list of things that annoy me is longer than I expected.

Just when you think you’ve reached your limit, some new trend or new annoyance twirls in….and that brings us to the part where we welcome Winter.

THE WEATHER

This whole polar vortex malarkey has really been whipping everyone’s ass into shape this season. The freezing rain and high psychotic winds and snow was cute for about 10.5 minutes.

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THROWBACK TALES

Throwback Tales: Welcome To The Dark Side: Part Two

online dating

So a few weeks ago, I began to share the time of this past summer when I gave into the thought of trying online dating.

Almost a full week into it I’d ran across some party boys, a guy I used to be involved with, a guy who claimed I was his new B.F.F., a guy that looked like Glenn Close, guys who clearly weren’t schooled on proper pictures to use for a dating site (like really who are the chicks in your photo, sir) and a few other bunches of HELL NO.

lesbianRight when I was ready to back out of my decision of joining this online catastrophe I ended up connecting and chatting with a guy that had a mutual friend in common with me. My new friend was funny, sweet, never ran out of things to talk about with me and I genuinely began to look forward to hopping on and learning more about him and he seemed to feel the same. Could it be…..my luck was changing?!

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THROWBACK TALES

Throwback Tales: Welcome To The Dark Side: Part One

online dating

At least once a month I like to throw in something I created on Throwback Thursday called “Throwback Tales”, which goes back in time to something ridiculous I’ve experience so we can all sit and laugh at what a fool how interesting life can be at times.

Considering this is the last Thursday of 2013, I saved this particular tale and something that happened this summer’s end for last. It definitely isn’t the most outrageous incident that has happened, but it inspired three parts of Throwback Tales and it’s something I said I would never, ever, ever do.

TRY ONLINE DATING.

After being pressured from friends and family members probably secretly browsing through brochures to throw me into a convent, I gave into the idea for over an entire month. And lived to blog about it.

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